Why My Mailman Hates Me

Because I hate shopping in stores, I do it online. And after a while, when you start shopping at enough places, enough times, online, they start sending you catalogs. And they sell your name to other catalog companies as well. The result:

This is one day's mail. If you're keeping score at home, that's 11 catalogs.

That's why my mailman hates me. It's because he's a whiner.

We live in a culdesac, and we have very little actual curb at our house, besides the driveway. He gets all colicky whenever we have ANYTHING parked in front of our house, because then he has to GET OFF HIS LARD-ASS and actually STAND to put stuff in our mailbox. It's also a problem on garbage day too... on more than one occasion we've had the little "mailman hate mail" placed in our mailbox by him, stating that he can't deliver mail if there is something within 25 feet of the mailbox.

Whiner. It took longer to fill out the hate mail form than it would have taken to actually get off his ass and deliver the mail.

Just sayin.


OneHungMan said...

People suck.

Pete Dunn said...

25 feet? How wide IS this guys ass?

That One Guy said...

That's what I'm sayin. Crybaby.

Anonymous said...

I will now sheepishly admit that I had not emptied my mailbox since December 29th. You think your postman is pissed....