Two old ladies, Mabel and Maude, are outside their nursing home, having a drink and a smoke, when it starts to rain.
Mabel pulls out a condom, cuts off the end, puts it over her cigarette, and continues smoking.
"What the hell is that?" asks Maude.
"A condom," replies Mabel. "This way my cigarette doesn't get wet."
"Where did you get it?" asks Maude.
"You can get them at any drugstore," says Mabel.
The next day, Maude hobble herself into the local drugstore and tells the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms.
The pharmacist, obviously embarrassed, looks at Maude kind of strangely (she is, after all, over 80 years old), but very delicately asks what brand of condom she prefers.
"Doesn't matter, Sonny," says Maude, "as long as it fits on a Camel."
And that's when the pharmacist fainted.